Keeping the Home Fires Burning

For many couples who have been couples for years and years they may feel as if the spark has gone out of the relationship, or they are no longer interested in their partner. However, one of the greatest gifts we have as humans is the ability to create, develop and strengthen our bond over the years. Strong marriages that last decades are not boring, stagnant or irritating. Instead they remind the couple of why they are a couple in the first place. Each one supplies what the other needs in the relationship and continues to encourage the growth and development of their spouse.

One of the precepts of giving love and respect to your partner and expressing your love through the love language your partner understands and internalizes, it igniting the spirit of our partner and strengthening the bond that holds you together. Through the years it can be easy to fall into patterns of behavior that bring out the worst, instead of the best, in your partner. It can be very easy to misunderstand that your woman is lashing out because she doesn’t feel love and cherished by her man. Or, misinterpret your manís silence from feeling disrespected as anger and unloving – when in fact he loves you deeply but can’t figure out how to show you so you understand.

To keep those home fires burning brightly you both have to work together to demonstrate respect and love through your tone of voice, facial expressions and the words you choose to use. Your partner deserves unconditional respect and love – and if they don’t then why in the world are you with them in the first place?

For instance, if your man is not professing his love for you, providing for you and protecting you – but is instead abusive in his language or physical acts – then why are you in this relationship? If your woman disrespects you in public and private, belittles what you say, do and make or believes that she is better, stronger and financially more stable than you – then why are you in this relationship?

This isn’t to say that if these instances occur you should run right out and try to find someone new. But, instead you should first talk out your differences and determine if their actions are rooted in their personality or if they are lashing out because you haven’t been meeting their needs. If it’s just a part of who they are and the woman doesn’t understand your need for respect or the man your need for love, then it’s time to start thinking about the real reasons you’re in this relationship.

On the other hand, if it’s possible that you both understand but can’t seem to find your way back to treating each other well, then the help of a professional might be just what turns your relationship around and puts you back on the right path.

Once there, don’t stray! Remember to seek out your partners love language and use it every day to remind them that you love and respect them. Show them respect in the tone of your voice, the things that you say and your actions. Love and respect are the two most important building blocks of any relationship. When you can develop these in each other you’ll discover the incredible benefits of a stable and strong relationship.

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