How to have a long distance relationship

How to have a long distance relationship is a question that more of us are asking given the current state of the economy.  More of us are having to travel further afield in order to find well paid employment and that sometimes means leaving a loved one behind.  Or you may never have lived close to one another.  With the increasing number of people meeting over the internet, it is becoming very common to find yourself in love with someone who lives some distance away.

Is a long distance relationship easy?  No but with hard work and perseverance it is possible.  Communication is key and finding ways to communicate is something that most people struggle with.  While email, video calls and texting are wonderful inventions, they can sometimes lead to disagreements and misunderstandings because the person’s true personality doesn’t always show through. Your brain need to be able to read the subtle body language of your partner.  Your partner may say something to you on an email which causes you deep frustration and hurt.  Yet if he had said the same thing to you while he held your hand or had just given you a cuddle, it wouldn’t have caused any problems. 

Long distance relationships can cause other issues too. You may feel lonely when your partner is away.  We all have those days where the only thing that will make us feel better is a cuddle and a hug.  Easy to do when you live together but not so easy when he is the other side of the country or  perhaps even deployed overseas.

So how do you make this type of relationship work?  You need to lay down some ground rules of what is and isn’t acceptable behavior.  It is important to know whether you are in an exclusive relationship or free to date other people.

You need to find things to do to occupy your time when your partner is away.  You could learn a new language or take an evening course or study for some exams at work.  Try to pick something you will enjoy doing to fill the lonely times ahead. You can also use the latest technologies to stay more connected, even for intimate pleasures.

Knowing you will only see each other one or two times a month will make those times extra special. You will probably find that both of you make an extra special effort to enjoy yourself and have a good time.   In the meantime all the corresponding by email, video calls and phone will help you to really get to know one another at a deeper level.  You can share views and opinions by email that you may have difficulty broaching face to face.  If you have been together prior to the distance splitting you up, having time apart will help you decide whether you have a future together or not. If as a couple you can survive this period of distance you will be stronger and better prepared to face the challenges life will throw at you.

For more visit www.neuro-couple.com

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