[:en]What Men Look for in a Relationship: Needy or Independent[:]

[:en]Men are interesting creatures and women are complex. Ok this isn’t helping and just shows how much complex relationships are.

All told, it makes for some difficult conversations and communications. Women are looking for reasons that men stay in relationships should consider the balance between being needy and being independent.

Men want women who need them but aren’t needy.

They want women who are independent but rely on their guy for support. So how exactly can you walk the fine line between who you ARE and who they want you to be.

Although difficult, you can affect this balance through a series of actions that speak to your partner without beating him over the head with the information. Men love action. They understand how to interpret actions. On the other hand, they don’t enjoy long conversations or explanations and discussions.

The most important piece of the puzzle is that you remain yourself.

If you try to change who you are it’s likely that you won’t be able to hold on to the behavior changes. However, you might be independent and powerful at work, there is a side of you that is softer and more feminine. That’s the side of you that you should be bringing home and showing to your partner.

Each of us has two sides and must feed both to stay balanced and whole.

Men are attracted to women who are balanced, whole and healthy.

Part of a woman’s ability to be independent is intelligence. Although the media likes to portray intelligent men attached to ditzy woman because they are sexy and good looking, the reality is that women with intelligent men must be able to hold conversations with people in his crowd. Remember there is a real reason that George Clooney held out for an intelligent and beautiful lawyer.

The difference between being independent and dependent is how you express both. Each of us, men and women, have a streak of both independence and dependence. But, it’s about how you express those characteristics. Steer clear of being needy and clingy, while valuing his opinion and respecting him. Keep the job you want but don’t bring the issues home with you. If you don’t trust him, then don’t stay. You won’t trust him by sticking to his side 24 hours, seven days a week. At some point, if he’s going to stray, then he’s going to stray.

Stay busy with your life and bring home the interesting details. Men want you to have your own life but live your life together with him. Your objective is to articulate and open-minded while showing him respect.

Be You, be Two, Be New

Thomas[:]

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