Courtship

Becoming involved with anyone in a romantic relationship can cause some degree of uncertainty, especially when you aren’t sure what comes first, second and third. The rules of dating have changed over the years. In years past the expectations about a physical relationship have moved from no sex before marriage to sex on the first date and now many are waiting until they have determined that they are interested in developing a long-term relationship.

The courtship phase of a relationship are the initial dates, weeks and sometimes month or two, during which you are both on your best behavior. This is the stage that has moved beyond the boundaries of “just dating” to working toward the possibility of a firm commitment. Courtship is a time in the relationship when you also both spend some intense time learning about each others likes and dislikes, character traits, career and life goals and financial planning. This is the stage when your brain plays tricks on both of you and drives you towards a potential break-up in a few months  … More about this HERE.

Courtship happens when you both want the same thing. In other words, one isn’t interested in the possibility of marriage while the other is interested in a couple of hookups before moving on. For the most part, it’s important that both people talk with each other about the goals they have in this courtship stage. However, it isn’t necessary that you come out and call it courtship or identify exactly why you want the information you’re seeking. However, if your partner has half a brain they will know exactly whatís going on and will likely have the same idea you do.

In other words, courtship is dating with a purpose in mind. And, that purpose is marriage at the end of the rainbow. During courtship it’s important to visit and spend time with the family of your partner. And, if they are thinking they’ll want to do the same thing. You know the expression, “The apple doesn’t fall very far from the tree.”? Take a good look at mom and dad – that will be your partner in just a couple years.

During courtship it’s important to set boundaries for yourself and your relationship. Those boundaries include what you’ll do physically, emotionally, financially and with each others family. This is the time to learn more and make decisions before your heart takes over and you aren’t able to make decisions based on facts instead of what you perceive is the love of your life.

Be You, Be Two, Be New,

Thomas

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